Muschamp Rd

Now I’m a shiny new psycho

February 27th, 2007
Black Snake Moan

I’m not sure why, but apparently someone who posts under the name “Zseni” has taken the text from my recent post about the movie “Black Snake Moan” which I thought looked cool and posted it to some forum. Maybe they don’t like Christina Ricci or Samuel Jackson. Maybe they don’t like movies. Maybe they don’t like blogs. Maybe they just like to steal people’s blog posts, put them up on some forum, and call them a psycho. Maybe they like to insult random people on the internet for fun. Maybe they like to hide behind some handle which I only assume they think is cool and troll. Maybe they like to kick people when they are down. Maybe they like to pick on the mentally ill.

I don’t know. I don’t understand.

If I had a dollar for every time I had to type those last two sentences I’d have $27.50. I don’t know why I bother, I don’t know why I care, but I do. I’ve been hurt, I haven’t recovered and I really don’t appreciate people who think it is necessary to insult me online while hiding under some handle in some forum I’ve never even heard of, I’m sure they think they’re real cool.

Am I being baited, probably? Why do I take the bait, because I’m sick of shit like this. If someone really has an objection to something I’ve said why not just say so to my face, or in an email, or even in a comment on my blog. I’m a reasonable person. If I write something factually incorrect and someone from the company informs me of my error, I correct it. If someone thinks I should have performed an additional calculation in a spreadsheet I created, I fix the spreadsheet. If someone makes a reasonable request for additional information I provide it.

Why? Because I’m a nice guy.

I don’t deserve to be treated this poorly, surely most people would agree? But that doesn’t stop people from being immature, doubly so when online.

Maybe I should call people names, scream and yell, use profanity. Maybe I should call in the lawyers, file some DMCA request to have my intellectual property removed. I’m not Michael Crook, I feel sorry for Michael Crook. Someday he is going to regret some of the things he said and did. Everyone regrets things they say and do.

I’m not denying the holocaust. I’m not threatening anyone with a violent death. I write about my interests, my hobbies, my life. It is a personal frickin’ blog. I try to have a level of quality control, I try to be at least a little bit professional. People find my blog in search engines, people link to my blog, as Emlyn pointed out recently, folks like Business Week.

Why insult someone you don’t even know? Why am I a psycho because I’m looking forward to a movie?

I don’t know. I don’t understand.

Now I have $28.50!

You don’t earn respect by maligning someone, especially anonymously on the internet.

I could make up some witty quip to mock this “Zseni”. I could register at the forum and get in a flame war. I could do nothing. Instead I’ll just write another blog posting. And ask another question:

If I’m such a psycho, what are you doing reading my blog?

I found the website Caltrops.com because someone linked to my blog and it showed up in my referral logs. What is Caltrops.com? Well according to their about page:

Caltrops is a web site about videogames. It was founded in the western United States in 2002 by Entropy Stew, a programmer, Fussbett Sanitario, an artist, and Senor Barborito, a man of varied talents.

Also from the about page:

What sort of person reads Caltrops? What does he discuss?

There are some 1000 regular readers in over 100 countries. These countries are on every continent except Antarctica. The readers’ ages range from 13 to 83 but most are between 15 and 60. Many work in the gaming industry, most do not: the ranks of Caltrops include doctors, paralegals, farmers, pipe fitters, stenographers, meatpackers, and deep-sea divers.

A shared taste in in web-based comic strips is one reliable indicator of potential friendship; many Caltroppers enjoy strips like Penny Arcade, Johnny Litmus, The Porking Lot, Fish & Game, and Carmack’s Freetown.

You may not discuss anything on Caltrops that would be illegal to discuss in the United States. All other topics—politics, media, products available for sale—are acceptable.

Apparently it is acceptable to call some random person a psycho.

Another random person insulting me online

Update May 6th 2009

Apparently they are still at it over on the most important videogame website you’ve never heard of. How do I know, web analytics, I haven’t forgotten about Caltrops.com. I have a pretty good memory. They’ve written more stuff, which I assume passes for intelligent and biting commentary over there. I shouldn’t argue with a fool, people might not be able to tell the difference, but I clicked on a thread/post which had my name on it, this is what it said:

Caltrops Posting

Apparently Wagner James Au, the most powerful Second Life journalist of 2007’s career is doing fine. He states this in all seriousness like I’d ever even heard of him or I’d even played Second Life. Maybe I was too busy having beers with Paul Lee at the Bootup Labs’ Beers with Brad event. Someone like Paul Lee, Tarrnie Williams, or Douglas Tronsgard, not to be a homer, but I think they have more influence on video games than Mr. Au.

Maybe because I met Paul, Tarrnie, and Douglas in the real world, in Vancouver, it doesn’t count as much as meeting them in Second Life or on Caltrops. Oh wait some people are too busy for Second Life. Some of us are trying to have a positive impact on the real world, not pretending we’re actually cool by using a silly handle online.

I wonder how the economic downturn is affecting Second Life or the people who try to make a living off being an avatar and a reporter in a virtual world? I’m not for kicking people when they’re down, but good luck with that career choice. I know I’ve made some questionable ones such as doing my MBA. And I know I’ve spent too much time hanging out in online forums, such as Bolter and Chainsword. I’m sure they’ll find something wrong with Warhammer 40,000. They probably don’t want to hear I’ve never even played Dawn of War either.

Oh if we’re dropping names of actually famous video game industry people, it was good when Wil Wright came to Vancouver and I was invited to the Great Northern Way Campus, the big digital week is coming up in Vancouver, a bunch of people I know are nominated for PopVox awards and then later there is the Game Developers Conference. I’m sure Second Life is better than Vancouver…

I guess I should actually make use of LinkedIn connections seeing as I’m trying to do more stuff and people are starting to notice BOB.

Update May 3rd 2012

Today has been a shitty day, but it is good to see that the self important folks over at Caltrops.com still have nothing better to do than mock me or make fun of my problems or battles with mental illness. You know what is cool, picking on the mentally ill. All the cool kids I know hang out on forums and make fun of people who are sick and decided to write about it online. Perhaps they had hoped that in writing about their problems and battle with mental illness, it would help someone. A lot of people struggle with depression and other mental illnesses and picking on them on the Internet, doesn’t help. So much for the audacity of hope. And as for Fussbett Sanitario aka Wagner James Au, aka @slhamlet and his buddies over at Caltrops, you’re not impressing anyone by continuing to insult and pick on the mentally ill. That isn’t even cool in Second Life. 

Update March 2015

Having battled depression for over ten years, I can not recommend blogging about your personal problems. Some people will never believe you and they just do not care how much their words and actions hurt you. I doubly do not recommend blogging about your personal problems while looking for work. Depression has left many gaps in my resume and I’ve never recovered from doing my MBA at the Sauder School of Business.


  • Apparently the people over at Caltrops still find it socially acceptable to call people they don’t know Psychos and boost themselves up by picking on people who are ill.

    They probably didn’t consult my resume before doing so. They probably didn’t notice that although I did live with my mother for a time in Deep Bay BC, I actually live and work in Vancouver BC for the most part. They also probably didn’t clue in that I know a lot of people in the Video Game industry. People who work at Radical Entertainment, Relic, Rockstar, Electronic Arts, Hothead…

    I could go on and on but people hiding behind silly handles on unimportant online forums don’t care. Caltrops.com has a PageRank of 4. Four! This blog has a PageRank of four and I didn’t even try, I don’t have Google Ads (yet) any fool can put up an online forum and any fool can put up a blog, but maintaining a webpage for over ten years as I have done takes time and effort. And insulting people you don’t even know is not a good career move, maybe I should join their little online forum, but I prefer to mock them nice and public like.

    Maybe they should learn how Google and the Internet work before they go insulting every blogger they come across who likes Samuel Jackson, Christina Ricci, the Blues, or film making…

  • Apparently the people over at Caltrops still find it socially acceptable to call people they don’t know Psychos and boost themselves up by picking on people who are ill.

    They probably didn’t consult my resume before doing so. They probably didn’t notice that although I did live with my mother for a time in Deep Bay BC, I actually live and work in Vancouver BC for the most part. They also probably didn’t clue in that I know a lot of people in the Video Game industry. People who work at Radical Entertainment, Relic, Rockstar, Electronic Arts, Hothead…

    I could go on and on but people hiding behind silly handles on unimportant online forums don’t care. Caltrops.com has a PageRank of 4. Four! This blog has a PageRank of four and I didn’t even try, I don’t have Google Ads (yet) any fool can put up an online forum and any fool can put up a blog, but maintaining a webpage for over ten years as I have done takes time and effort. And insulting people you don’t even know is not a good career move, maybe I should join their little online forum, but I prefer to mock them nice and public like.

    Maybe they should learn how Google and the Internet work before they go insulting every blogger they come across who likes Samuel Jackson, Christina Ricci, the Blues, or film making…

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