Muschamp Rd

My Post MBA Job Search

June 2nd, 2007
Sauder School of Business logo

When I finished my Sauder MBA I was traumatized, ostracized, and worse. The administration led by Anne DeWolfe prefer to insist I must be lying, that I wasn’t negatively affected by what others said or did, by the threats and allegations, by the agreement I was forced into on March 17th 2005.  I kept things secret to the benefit of others and the detriment of my own sanity. However, many people knew the truth and they just didn’t care, they had a party to go to and a facade of normalcy to maintain.

I’ve since tried to understand why…

People just don’t care, the Sauder School of Business had my money. I was expected to go off and begin my post MBA career. Things never got better as I was promised. People “moved on” which meant turning their back on me, pretending all was well and going off to celebrate with my accuser, and sending me the photos. I remain a statistical anomaly, an outlier, an externality.

Some of the cover letters I've written since completing my MBA degree

Years later I’m still suffering with health problems. I’ve been deemed unemployable or unsuitable by many, many organizations. Rejection remains my closest companion. Despite uncountable sleepless nights and pleas for answers and help, I remain the class pariah. No one believes me and no one wants me.

I’ve made details of my MBA experience available online. That has probably been detrimental to my career. Of course, the fact the Sauder School of Business found it necessary to threaten me with arrest and expulsion for repeatedly trying to help a classmate with her internship search remains obscure. After over seven years you would think some people would finally believe me, but I and others gave up hope long ago.

The Sauder School of Business and the majority of my MBA classmates prefer to pretend I don’t exist. They’re happy to engage in revisionist history and smile for glossy advertisements while I remain alone by choice or by necessity it doesn’t matter which anymore.

My classmates have long known how they made me feel. They prefer to pretend everything is “great” especially when they want something from me. I didn’t need to write this brutally honest account of my life, none of this needed to happen. If any of my classmates wanted things to be any other way than they are now, they would have said and done something years ago.

Job Search Summary

When I returned from China, I spent many months walking my sister’s dog, blogging, begging people to believe me and of course looking for a job. My bed during a portion of my post-MBA job search After finally finding a job my 3 months of employment in Vancouver came to an end, I was once again looking for a job and soon to be homeless. I spent the next several months lying on the floor of an unfurnished apartment in East Van with the bed bugs and mice reading Dostoevsky.

Finally I ended up working in the Downtown Eastside at a non-profit. After two years, funding ran out for my position and eventually the organization ceased to exist. Since then, I’ve volunteered, studied more, but mainly I have been unemployed, unable to convince anyone to believe me, to hire me. I finally ended up back at my mother’s house.One of the mice with which I shared my East Van apartment

Now I have an extensive collection of rejection letters. Below is a partial list of organizations that decided to interview me before determining I wasn’t the right “fit”.Another dead mouse I found in my East Vancouver apartment

  • Amazon
  • Electronic Arts
  • Pangaea Ventures
  • Updata Partners
  • Opera
  • TD Securities
  • BMO Capital Markets
  • MDA
  • Kasian
  • Serenic
  • Google
  • Robert Half
  • BC Government
  • Best Buy
  • DigiBC
  • BCAA
  • Korn/Ferry International
  • TEKsystems
  • Slant Six Games
  • Regional Municipality of Wood Buffalo
  • City of Richmond
  • Fundamental Research Corp.
  • Accelerate Okanagan
  • Angus Reid
  • Virtuos
  • A&W Canada
  • Simon Fraser University
  • Ayogo
  • TEEMA Solutions Group
  • Telus
  • CFIB
  • Firefly Fine Wines and Ales
  • Eruptive Games
  • Small Business BC
  • Vancity
  • Atimi
One of many dead mice I found in my apartment
I published this post knowing full well it won’t change a god-damn thing. I used to think telling the truth was important. Now I know otherwise, if you learn nothing else at the Sauder School of Business, you learn that people just don’t care.

All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

Sverre, one of my MBA classmates, sent me this quotation years ago. I wonder if he appreciates the irony considering all the standing around and shrugging he and the rest of my classmates have done?

Update December 2012

After being contacted by one of my former professors, I updated this blog posting as there still remains some mystery as to what my life has been like since I left the University of British Columbia. I also learned that after seven years of suffering, online popularity contests remain more important than my well being to UBC staff. The only time I ever hear from anyone connected to the Sauder School of Business is when they want something. I’ve since removed yet another connection from LinkedIn.

People don’t believe me and they just don’t care how much their words and actions hurt me. It is still the official position that I must be lying, nothing can be done, and I wouldn’t be negatively affected by the agreement or what people said or did on & since March 2005.

Apparently years and years of being sick and unemployed does not constitute being “negatively affected” in the eyes of UBC staff. People read my blog at UBC, they just can't be bothered to or say anything, even on Bell Let's Talk Day. Anne DeWolfe partying with my former classmates

I also gave into the relentless advertising and tweeted on Bell Let’s Talk day I was greeted with overwhelming silence. This blog has remained online, even though it is painful. If anyone connected to the Sauder School of Business or the University of British Columbia is still reading this far down the page, I still lie awake at night, haunted with unanswered questions:

  1. How long was the investigation that determined my guilt?
  2. What was the reasonable person test that determined my guilt?
  3. Why must I be lying?
  4. Why was it necessary to ruin my life on St. Patrick’s Day 2005?

I should have ended up a hashtag, instead I’m still blogging seven years later. I remember the words of Anne DeWolfe the last time I spoke to her:

Secrecy was never part of the agreement.

Gary and Marlene Lau at an official Sauder MBA party circa March 2005Long before staff at the university in alumni relations, career services, even health services started pretending I don’t exist, my classmates, even those who insisted they were my friend, have done their best to ignore what happened and ignore the years of pain and suffering. I don’t know what to say anymore, people still doubt the veracity of my words, how can I make the truth any more painfully clear? Sudden requests via email for favours or to ‘Link in’ just seem tauntingly cruel. Nothing has been “great” about my life since March 2005 Roy. You seem to have forgotten some facts, for instance we were LinkedIn once. I even created the official Sauder MBA LinkedIn group. Then I was forced to remove you all from my life. The way things are is the way other people insist they have to be.

In my ill fated email sent during March of 2005, I compared myself to the Phantom of the Opera, even I didn’t know how apt a comparison that was. But having been forced to live alone, in fear, in the shadows, maligned, ostracized, traumatized, I know exactly how the Phantom feels. I remain the pariah of the Sauder MBA program.

Making a literary allusion is not a crime, neither is trying to help a classmate with their internship search. I leave you with the words of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.

Update January 2015

After finishing a series of short contracts in 2014 I was unable to find full-time work in Vancouver or anywhere. The only thing I seem to be qualified to do after completing my Sauder MBA is teach English overseas which is what I was doing ten years ago before my Sauder MBA. People continue to pretend nothing is wrong, nothing can be done, and that no one was negatively affected.

I was negatively affect by my Sauder MBA and by the words and actions of the Administration of the University of British Columbia and those of my MBA Classmates.

Update December 2018

I can’t believe I am updating this post again, but after passing the third and final CFA exam I set out to find a new job, no one wants to hire me, except to teach at a different school. I have of course applied to hundreds of jobs, I didn’t even get any interviews for months until I got referred to a recruiter by a guy from my gym. I have of course been “networking”, I just got back from the UBC Alumni Dinner in Shanghai. There has been a lot of turnover in staff since March 2005 and people have forgotten about me, or never heard about me. But I haven’t forgotten, I haven’t recovered, and my desire for a job other than the crappy ESL teaching job I have now will likely lead to me being unemployed and living with my mother, just like after I finished my last MBA exam in Beijing, and this time I didn’t even get a piece of paper.

I’m also sure I’m going to end up in some glossy photo, I dutifully smiled, I even agreed to ask a question at the request of the person who invited me. But I haven’t forgotten what people said and did, I have not recovered, everything I said is still true and still people refuse to believe me and refuse to care.


  • Arch says:

    Mate, I’ve been reading your blog for a while but I couldn’t get exactly what did happen to you anyways. I see you’ve been through a lot of pain and anger and that it has consumed you and I feel sorry about your situation right now and all that it has been for these years since the fact that you claim to be the injustice they did to you, I’d like to you to send me a mail, link in your blog or a reply explaining details of this situation since I’m right now studying for GMAT looking after to attend MBA course somewhere in Canada and Sauder is an option I have considered all alone and I don’t want to spend money and time of my life to maybe get screwed up by being a good person and helping others, like you did, and like is my personality. For now I wish you light in your path, it’s not much help but my concern is that you read about and practice ho’oponopono as a way to forgive all these people you feel have thrown you in this black hole and smokes off all this bad energy that has got you stucked in anger and despair and bring you to a higher level energy that attracts good people and situations to your life, I may be moving to Vancouver after august and we can get to chat if you need someone to hear you, you seem a good hearted person, just move on mate !

    • Muskie says:

      I am leaving Vancouver, I could not find work despite my Sauder MBA. The best job I could find after months of searching, indeed the only job I could find with an MBA and BSc. in Computer Science was teaching English overseas. I am the poster child for MBAs not being worth the cost. Good luck and be careful who you trust.

  • Sauder WHAT says:

    If you got that many interviews and didn’t land a job…ever think you’re just a dick that blames his problems on others?

    • Muskie says:

      First of all thank you for your kind words of compassion and understanding. No seriously, it took a lot of effort to create that fake account with the clever name “Sauder WHAT” and the equally clever fake email address. You are obviously someone who cares about your fellow man. Why else belittle strangers online who have suffered for years with mental illness?

      Congratulations random Internet asshole, it is people like you that caused Amanda Todd to kill herself.

      But seriously thank you, thank you for letting me know once again I failed. No matter how much time I spend trying to make sense of what happened, I fail. Apparently “I’m a dick.” I’m a dick because I trusted people who insisted they were my friends. I’m a dick because I went out of the way to help “my friends”. I’m a dick because I apologized for whatever I said or did. I’m a dick because I went away and stayed away. I’m a dick for trusting people. I’m a dick because I kept things secret instead of going around badmouthing others or lawyering up. I’m a dick for actually finishing my MBA program instead of dropping out and killing myself. I’m a dick because I actually thought people might finally believe me. I’m a dick because I was too depressed to even get out of bed. I’m a dick because I lived in fear for years after people I trusted repeatedly threatened me. I’m a dick for continuing to tell the truth even though doing so causes me nothing but pain and opens me up to yet more abuse hurled by random Internet strangers who think they’re clever. I’m a dick for working in the DTES instead of some air conditioned glass tower. I’m a dick because I had to deal with more rejection, pain, and despair than you can comprehend. I’m a dick for sleeping on the floor with the bed bugs and mice. I’m a dick for actually believing the marketing materials of the University of British Columbia and the Sauder School of Business. I’m a dick for actually thinking my life would be better because I did a Master’s degree. I’m dick for expecting people to acknowledge my existence instead of pretending nothing is wrong, nothing can be done, no one was negatively affected for over eight years.

      Yeah I’m a dick. That must be the answer, thank you for finally clarifying, thank you for succinctly annunciating the crux of the problem. Thank you for thinking enough of yourself to hurl insults at random people online. Thank you, thank you for leaving a comment on my blog.

      Thank you for reminding me again what a failure my MBA was/is and how I spent so much time and effort helping people for no other reason than I could and I thought they were my “friends”. Thank you random Internet commenter for reminding me why I kept things secret, why I previously took down my blog, why I didn’t talk to anyone, why I didn’t leave the house, why I spent all that time lying on the floor trying to understand. All that time and the answer was so obvious, “I’m a dick.”

      If other intrepid Internet surfers come to the same or similar conclusion and feel like showing off their vocabulary and their ability to choose fake Internet handles, they’ll find I’m far less enthusiastic about silently suffering abuse than I used to be, they’ll find their comment goes unpublished and unacknowledged.

  • silosilo says:

    hey, sorry to hear about the story. seems to be a few rough years your coming up on.

    I’m an interntional student thinking of doing my MBA in B.C. but nwo I might have to reconsider. Wasnt good enough to get into Sauder anyway, but I think I could’ve gotten into Uvic Gustavson. Maybe I will concentrate my efforts on Toronto now, maybe McMaster. Supposedly they have pretty good post grad prospects for the Co-op Mba, but then again, as you mentioned, who knows how much of it is true…

    • Muskie says:

      I’m going to update this post…

      As for choosing a school, I’ve written about that somewhere on this blog. Basically look at who recruits at that school. And by recruits I mean regularly comes on campus to hire graduates of the program. Sometimes a student has the job before doing their MBA or manages to land the job themselves. Schools report a lot of statistics but they massage them as much as possible. The various agencies rank programs, one magazine specifically looks at who recruits and how much graduates make as the foundation of their rankings.

      McMaster might not be a bad option. It’s in Hamilton not Toronto I believe. I know people who went to UVIC, it’ll have an even harder time getting recruiters to come on campus as it is on an Island off the coast. Being in Ontario or the Eastern Standard Timezone is appealing to recruiters. Making a personal connection with a recruiter probably helps in this era of massed electronic email submission.

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